Just4Jo - A fat chick trying not to be...

Yep - I have made it through not only Monday & Tuesday, but nearly Wednesday as well!
I've been super good, filled up on fresh fruits when I have felt hungry, and last night when I was starving and usually would have headed straight for the lollie jar or Cheezel packet, I boiled the jug, made a Jarrahs Chocolatte drink and had a hot cross bun with NO BUTTER!!
I was well impressed with myself I can tell ya!!
Baby steps
Baby steps
Baby steps
That's how I started this journey, and it looks like it may be the way that I have to finish it too!
Not that is worries me of course, cos baby steps are easier to take at the moment..
So much going on in my life, with work, friends, Rhian, and just other stuff too...
Baby steps are good!

I had an absolute blast at the ball on Saturday night - and can you belive I totally forgot to get a picture taken of me in my gorgeous dress!!!
GUTTED!!!!
I had my hair done all pretty and flicky outy and feminine too, boy o boy did I look hot!!!
Hahahahaha...
Apparently I looked "stunning"!!   *blush*
Anyway, a fabulous time was had by all, and Sunday was spent recovering!!

Prunes, natural yoghurt and bran was on the menu for breakfast this morning...... and I gotta admit that it was actually quite nice!
I've stocked up on fruit as well, and I am sooooo proud to admit that yesterday I didn't let one single bad thing pass my lips!!
I know, I know - it's only ONE day, but at the moment, it's baby steps for me, and there were a couple of moments yesterday where I could have succumbed quite easily!
Like when I was cleaning up after dinner and there was food left on Rhian's plate - it would have been so easy to pick at it and not worry.
BUT I DIDN'T!!!!!
Then after dinner and after Rhian had gone to bed, J had an ice cream and asked me if I wanted a bite..... I said NO!!
AND... I didn't go near the lollie jar all night either!
So yeah - a good day....
Today will be just as good.
I have food with me at work so I dont need to go out at lunch time, and I have the chicken out defrosting at home, so it's chicken salad for dinner tonight...
I'm on to it!!!

AND..... I have promised Rhian that we will go to the park after work, so it will be a quick trip home, get changed and then off out for a walk.....
It takes about 20 mintues to walk to the park, so I'll do that instead of taking the car....

So there ya have it - I'm sorted for today!

Better put my thinking cap on for tomorrow now!!

And just because I can.....
Here is a picture of the dress that I am wearing to a ball tonight.
It is actually the dress that I wore as Bridesmaid at Steph's wedding, then I had to take it ain and make it smaller to wear to my work ball, then I oput straps on it to wear it to another ball, now I have added the dangly sparkly bits to wear it to the ball tonight!
It's the dress that just keeps getting reinvented! Anyway, I love it, and I think it looks great!!
Now I just gotta get my hair done, and I'll be set!!

115.3kg is what those damn obnoxious scales flashed up at me on Monday morning!!!!!
I nearly fell off the buggers!!
I know that I have had my head in the sand a bit lately, but I really didn't expect that number!!!
Put me in a right foul mood for the day I can tell ya!!!
But the planets realigned and all is right with the world again, because this morning, the numbers read 112.2kgs!
That would mean a loss of 2.1kgs in just 2 days!!
So I'm not sure if my scales were just being cruel on Monday, or if maybe I was retaining water or whatever, but I am MUCH happier with the number that I got this morning!
OK - so it is still a couple of kilos above where I was a few months ago, but hey - I've been living it up a bit lately, so it was bound to happen!
I developed an unhealthy addiction to Cheezels and pineapple lumps, but I am proud to say that I have now beaten that addiction - THANK GOD!!!

After doing some thinking, and some reading, and some soul searching, I have decided that I can deal with my food demons head on, and get through it all.
Or I can continue to deny that I have a self destructive relationship with food, and continue to gain weight, and see my goal slip further and further from my grasp.

The past three days I have been PLANNING my food, THINKING about what has been going into my mouth, and feeling good about it all!!!
I made sure that there were NO bags of cheezels in the trolley on grocery day, and there are none in the cupboard either.
Instead, there was bran flakes, natural yoghurt, fruit, loads of vegetables, whole grain bread (instead of the thickest fattest white bread I could find), low fat spread (instead of butter) and some WW cereal bars too just for good measure!
So instead of white toast with butter and peanut butter for breakfast like I have been having every other morning, I had bran flakes with natural yoghurt.  And ya know what???  It was bloody nice!!!  And damn filling too!!!!
Lunch today will be a salad and tuna sandwich, instead of whatever crap the lunch bar on the corner is offering!

It's funny, I didn't realise how much crap I was really eating, until I sat down and looked at it HONESTLY!
So, now it's time to get back on the wagon, saddle up, and make my way to the finish line.
It's not gonna be a speedy process, but It's gonna happen!!!
I've said before that 2007 will be my year, and I will get to goal!!
Well, I'll say it again.......... I WILL get to goal this year!
26.2kgs to lose to get to the Weight Watchers goal of 86kgs.
40 weeks to do it in....
I CAN do this!!
I WILL do this!

And like I have said before - my journal isn't a big part of my life anymore, but I'll still update on my progress, my highs and lows when I feel like it, but it wont be every day that's for sure.
Hell, it might not even be every week, but I'll still be here.... getting lighter and healthier!!!

BRING IT ON!!!!!

I killed him....
I damn well killed him!!!
I didn't think I was overworking him....
How was I to know that last night was going to be the last time that I would ever hear the glorious sounds he made, or inhale the wondrous smells wafting from his depths??
I should have known when I plugged him in....
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Was the noise that I heard.
But he wanted to work for me, he tried so hard to please me!!!
Hee seemed fine when I loaded him up as usual, once he was ready....
But his poor soul only lasted 2 minutes, before BANG!!!!
His lights went out for the last time....
AND.....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The chops were still bloody raw!!!

Hahahahahahahaha


RIP George Foreman - thank you for your hard work.
You'll be sadly missed
Until I replace you with a cheaper version of course!!!
Mwah ha ha ha ha ha..................

Yep - I blew up my damn Geroge Foreman Grill last night!!
Was looking forward to juicy porkchops for dinner.....
But got dried out "blah" ones cos I had to shove them in the oven under the grill!
NOT HAPPY!!!!!!!
I'll have to go buy another grill now.......
Hehehehe...
What a Drama Queen I am!!

Can ya tell I am a bit bored today???

Can ya, can ya???

I managed to drag my ass out of the house yesterday morning and go walking!
AMAZING HUH???
I had a couple of movies that needed to go back to the shop, so instead of getting in the car and driving, I chucked my walking shoes on and walked there instead!!!
It is about 2.2kms each way, and it took me just over 45 minutes, so I was bloody happy with that!!
I worked up a good sweat and felt totally invigorated as well!
Isn't it amazing how something so simple can make you feel so good??
After that I decided to go into the city to watch our Dragonboat team compete in the Wellington Regatta.
I had to pull out of the team this year unfortunately, just due to the practise times and the fact that I am a single mum these days - I dont have anyone that I can rely on to collect Rhian from daycare and take her until I have finished training, so I made the decision to leave the team.
Anyway...... back to the Regatta.
I walked around for about an hour looking for a friend, so by this stage my feet were killing me, we kept on missing each other, so when she text me and said that she was back at her car, which was about a half hours walk from where I was, I gave up!!!
Hehehehehe.....
All the walking that I did yesterday must have done some good though I reckon!
Pity I stuffed it up by eating Chinese Takeaway for dinner last night, followed by an ice cream!!
ARGH!!!!!!
Oh yeah - our team came in 2nd - a GREAT effort by all!!
WOOOHOOOOO!!!!!!
Wish I could have been on the boat - but hey - that's life huh??
Righto - I'm just babbling now.....
I have some shopping to do, then I am off for coffee with a girlfriend, then back home to cook dinner.
Gonna try to make it as healthy as possible tonight!
Hahahahaha......
Keep smiling everyone and enjoy the sunshine!!

I know I have been slack in updating lately......
I usually do my updates from work - and I have actually been really busy here lately...
I haven't completely gone off the rails, but I know that I have certainly not been making the best choices lately either.
I have been out walking a few times in my new neighbourhood, and I have loved it.
Rhian and I even walked down to the park a couple of times last week - so that was good for both of us!
I NEED to get back to the gym, but that is easier said than done...
Not sure what my mental block is lately, but I just can't get myself motivated enough to actually get to the gym at all!
I KNOW that I need to get organised the night before, but do you think I ever do??
NO!!!!!!!
Anyway.....
As great as it is to have the company, his eating habits are shall we say, less than healthy!!!
I need to get back into cooking proper healthy meals...
Last night was Nachos
Night before was McDonalds
Night before was toasted sandwiches!!
Not good, or healthy, or balanced AT ALL!!!
So this morning I got some diced chicken out of the freezer, and dammit - I'm gonna cook a stir fry for dinner!
An HEALTHY vegetable filled stir fry!!
YUMMMMMM!!!!!!!!

I had yesterday off work, and stayed in my PJ's all day long!!!
It was fantastic!!!
Well - not so fantastic when I woke up with a pounding headache and a churning stomach, but I took some vitamins and pain killers straight away, and I was feeling a LOT better by lunch time!
Although today, I have REALLY sore ribs (I think!!)
Every time I take a deep breath, or cough, I get a shooting pain in my right side...
Not too sure what is going on there, but if it carries on, I'll have to pay a visit to my friendly GP!

Righto - time to go catch up on yesterdays work now...

Keep smiling everyone!